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How would you react
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How would you react
How would you handle the situation if when swinging you, your spouse or your added partner/partners could not perform? Would you continue if your spouse was with the person that could not perform? In a 3sum setting what would you do if the added partner was having difficulty performing and being the added partner, how would you feel and would you expect the couple to understand?
Smooches,
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
Geez! That's a hard one! (or not in this case) lol I would want everybody involved to have a good time regardless of my performance issues. And I would hope the person I was with would care enough to understand. It happens. That doesn't mean, I still couldn't give her a good time. After all...it is better to give than to receive! lol I aim to please and I might just get heated up in the process. I'm a giver at heart!
Dale |
RE: How would you react?.....
You certainly are a giver Sweetie Pie, in many situations and I just wuv ya for that!!
Sometimes when swinging and a male experiences performance anxiety it can cause issues with the female because she will see her hubby penetrating the added partner when she isn't receiving that as well. This happens quite often when new to swinging.
We are always understanding and would absolutely NEVER make an added partner feel inadequate due to performance issues, that's just wrong if you ask me.
It does happen though and it's wise for a couple to realize this and be prepared how to proceed.
Smooches,
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
:offtopic: Speaking of performance...Do ya ever get the feeling we are on the stage in these forums and everybody else is watchin' us??? Geez! That'll give ya performance anxiety!! :LMAO: We're not getting a whole lotta a action out of them, so I guess we better "keep up" our end!! LOL
Dale :kiss: |
RE: How would you react?.....
:lol: Sweetie, all the world is a stage, hmmmmm didn't someone famous say that?....I do enjoy others responding to me but in the spirit of my helmet and crayons, I have no problems talking with myself!!! lmao
kisses
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
Well common sense is to know well enough to back off slow down and see if everything starts working properly... Have an Ex wife and we were into the full swap thing. Three different occasions one for each of us, first was my lady friend got cold feet I fully believe No means NO the night was over for me end of conversation... Ex and the other male knew it, told me a 3sm was out of the question and kept right on trucking with what they were doing... Very Rude and the lady and I were very upset for the lack of consideration but that's the way the Ex was it was all about her and the rules we made were met to be broken only by her at her whim.the second actually happened to me and the only way I would have got it up was to tape it to a popsicle stick, the lady I was with was very understanding she backed off and we went slow and eventually it all worked out boy what a wild night. Last time happened to the Ex when the male could not rise to the occasion, she got really mouthy and degraded the poor man about the size of his manhood compairing it to mine and his inability to perform, very embarassing for me him and his wife to the point everyone got really angry packed up and went home needless to say we never went out with them again and our street cred was blown out of the water from that day forward. I have a pretty large erection and I have scared a few women with it in my younger days and some men are intimidated by their wife being with a man larger than he is and the woman can also be intimidated by her man being with a woman she considers prettier than she is, Most swingers are not Porn Stars just plain old people with all of their lumps and bumps intact, most normal humans are just not the type that can perform at a wiggle of a zipper or drop of the panties and no matter who you are, how hung the man is or the most awsome woman you have ever seen is there will be a day it just won't work no matter how hard ya try, if you don't plan for that day then your in for very un-comfy time. Currently me and my new wife are just into the Exibitionist thing with a no swap, no getting freeky with the other couple to get things started and a manditory no touch during sex policy... |
RE: How would you react?.....
We have had that happen once when we were out. There is a lot you CAN do without a hard-on. We just moved onto other fun stuff, knocked it up to being a first time meet anxiety and that was it. Next time he did do better, and one on one he is fine. Sometimes its just getting used to the three people thing...even though we are all comfortable with the idea; our minds do sometimes play tricks on us!
Sharon |
RE: How would you react?.....
I agree with you totaly that one or the other or both may have a problem with a female being prettier, smaller or larger than she, and the guys of course can get a little odd concerning the size of their penis. It's human nature to feel jealousy and it's simply something that one must work through. It isn't jealousy that spoils a good time but more how one handles that jealousy.
I also agree that once performance anxiety strikes, it's best to back off and redirect and all involved must be aware of how to proceed and agree. As swingers we all should realize that during an encounter it's no longer just 2 people but 3 or four, sometimes more and all must have fun and be one the same page for it to end possitively.
Do you think that you and your wife will eventually swing? Are you easing into the lifestyle or simply enjoying doing what you do? What is holding you back from swinging?....
Just curious, not even judging!
Smooches,
Gin
|
RE: How would you react?.....
Don't know she is very shy as she is brand new at this.. She is all into the watching and being watched; however, not even thinking about a full swap and I'm not pushing we will let time tell the course.... Why you offering? |
RE: How would you react?.....
Don't know she is very shy as she is brand new at this.. She is all into the watching and being watched; however, not even thinking about a full swap and I'm not pushing we will let time tell the course.... Why you offering? |
RE: How would you react?.....
A good husband you are :clapping: So many people rush or push into the lifestyle and that rarely ends well. Take your time and allow everything to fall into place naturally, that's the best way to go.
Am I offering? A nice looking couple y'all are and I know that we have the patience needed to ensure a positive encounter, however, we do respect your boundaries. So Sir, I must ask, interested?
Smooches,
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
lmao Gawwwyyy, chalk it up to a woman with a BIG mouth :lol: Something similar happened with a couple we were with, his wife was so freakin vocal, in a pornstar annoying kinda way :lol: and all of us simply lost the motivation to continue. The second time though, we were able to tune her out and had an amazing time!!
kisses
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
They were friends and so much fun out of the bedroom so of course we got a second chance....Many would say that to swing makes us all 100 percent mental lmao...I know what you mean Sugar!!!
kisses
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
Always interested But I'm a patient person and would never do anything to make my sweetie upset |
RE: How would you react?.....
Perfect answer :clapping: Being fully understanding of the lifestyle, respecting boundaries and enjoying friendship, we would never ever ask you to!!!
Smooches,
Gin |
RE: How would you react?.....
Performance, Well there was this one couple, every time, I left the wife quivering. He, I would call cock phobic. Always hovering around the bed. But never to close or we might touch. He didn't like the way I preformed. Oral and toys always work. First times can always be hard. Each couple, each time can be different.
I, most times start with a 100 plus mile drive. Add weather and traffic. That can be a 2 1/2 too a 9 hour drive. Stress? only a little. I have found it best to laugh and play on. There can always be a second time. Some times it's just about having fun. How we do that, just depends. |
RE: How would you react?.....
i would get my partner in the mood while, pleaseing the other couple. |
RE: How would you react?.....
This post made me giggle....this has happened a few times ( with the same couple). My husband played with her, and her husband ( who couldnt keep it up) gave me oral all night. He wasn't at full mass but his fingers and tounge well made up for it. I think he was nervous because his wife was there. Once we decided to play solo, we made up for lost time..:o) |
RE: How would you react?.....
I have no problems if it does not get hard, I just send in a pinch hitter. I hand Sharon the strap on and let her finish for me. She's always telling me she can do anything a man can. |
RE: How would you react?.....
Maybe for all those hard or difficult times I should have a strap-on lol. I truly believe if Sharon was in the room, I would have a hard time not getting it up. |
RE: How would you react?.....
I have had some problems with getting hard but usually it is in a new group of people situation. Well like one of your other responders said.... I am also a pleaser so I just use the other tools at my disposal.... hands for massages.... fingers and of course my eager and willing tongue and mouth... I do not let it ruin my evening and I am perfectly happy giving pleasure. I am not there to fuck as many women as I can but rather to please those that want to be pleased. Of course some would like it to go further and I have been able to do that in a next meet and all is well. Most of the time though I find that if I am not freaked about it and still give what pleasure I can the ladies are good with that and are satisfied as well.... If a lady would start to be rude about it though I would just tell her that I would not want to fuck her anyway because of her mouth and just leave her alone. I would never be rude to anyone unless they are rude to me. Will not tolerate anyone being rude. Thing is it is all in the way one handles the situation..... I usually get over the "new" factor though now... guess I am getting more comfortable with that situation.
Joe |
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